Eyes
Faith, to me, is believing in someone or something without needing proof — proof that they would keep their promise, proof that they would keep you safe, proof that they exist. Most of the time, I rely on what I can see. But to be quite honest, it’s difficult to trust even what I can see (like that mute button on Zoom).
I’ve been working on my faith — faith in God, faith in Jesus. As 2 Corinthians 5:7 says, “We live by faith, not by sight.”
To be clear, I’ve always believed in God. I’ve never doubted His existence. That’s not what I’m working on. What I’m working on, what I admit I’m struggling with, is completely depending on Him, trusting in His plan and purpose for me, believing that whatever happens, He would provide me and my family with everything we need — every single day.
There are days when I fully trust in Him, and there are days when I fear for my family’s safety even when we’re just at home. I pray for safety throughout the day but at the same time remind myself that there’s no need to constantly check on what I’ve already placed in God’s hands. After all, Matthew 6:27 says, “Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?”
There are a couple of things I do to have more faith. Aside from praying, I read the Bible (currently the New International Version) and save my favorite verses or verses that have affected me in any way. Reading God’s Word helps me go through life and reminds me of His promises. I also try to read one devotional a day (I’m currently on day 96). Devotionals help me understand the Bible from someone else’s point of view and not just stick to my own perception. For instance, I never thought that 1 Peter 5:5 (“God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble”) could also mean telling a friend what you need when they ask if you need any help. To me, it only meant not being arrogant or boastful. I also follow several Instagrammers who post Scripture and show their love for the Lord. I love reading their personal stories because it makes me feel better knowing that we share the same struggles with faith and that our struggles won’t stop God from loving us. I also keep a prayer journal, which I use when I have difficulty praying or when my mind wanders that I feel writing my prayer down would help keep my focus. It’s nice to look back on past prayers and see what God has answered and which of my requests and plans and how much of my feelings have changed. Reading back has also shown me that some current life situations I so hate are the results of things I’ve prayed ceaselessly and so hard for in the past.
I know I’m gradually getting the hang of living by faith. At the same time, I know it will forever be a work in progress as I gain new perspectives, new experiences and new realizations. I just have to keep my eyes on God.
One-word prompt: Eyes